Oh! So that’s what a contract from a literary agent looks like. Though it looks a lot less blurred in person.

Some big things happened last week, and I’ve basically been exploding to tell the Internet all about it. I’ve signed a contract with Red Sofa Literary and will be working with literary agent Dawn Frederick. You can learn more about (the wonderful) Dawn on the agency’s website and via Publisher’s Marketplace. You should also follow her on Twitter.

Dawn is going to be pitching out the YA fantasy novel I’ve been toiling away with since the Fall of last year (I spent my vacation in Puerto Rico and Montreal working on it), and really, I’m just so excited. She’s got amazing ideas, and I’m already starting work on book #2 (what!) in the series.

Huge thanks to Jessica Anne, Peter Marinari, Steve Rauscher, Chris Urie, and Elizabeth Crutchley for spending the past few months workshopping this book with me. They washed down their dinner with my tears after giving me harsh criticism, and convinced me it was a story worth writing. They’re done an amazing job ripping apart and improving my manuscript since we started meeting in January.

Also to Jennifer Adams for her lovely touch ups and guidance, the Quirk crew for having my back, my darling Britt Miller for keeping me company during endless nights in Cosi, Tim, Melissa, and Chris for reading the rough cuts, Frankie Mallis for weekly pep talks, and Ransom Riggs for inspiring me to give this a shot in the first place.

And of course, Dawn for believing in this book! I can’t wait to work with you!

Expect lots of updates as things progress. Here we go!

Steve tearing apart a manuscript

So lately, I’ve broken up the monotony of my Sunday writing schedule by meeting up with three of my aspiring writer friends; Chris (Geekadelphia blogger, former intern at Quirk), Steve (local blogger, handsome man around town), and Jess (my eternal travel buddy). And since I started working on this new book, I’ve also met up with YA author Jessica Corra and my artist BFF Britt Miller.

During the week, I spend a lot of time in Cosi, Starbucks, etc. But on Sunday, I generally spend all day fussing with my in-progress novel, articles for Philly.com, and Geekadelphia blogs. The little writing group meets up at the end of the day, usually around 6pm, which is generally the time I’m finished with all that.

Aside from the fact that Chris, Jess, and Steve all give excellent advice, and the fact that Jess C. and Britt make lovely drinking-coffee-while-we-write companions, there is a reason I hang out with this select group of people.

Steve about to dish out his thoughts

They intimidate the Hell out of me.

Okay yes, they’re all my friends. Jess and Britt are particularly close friends of mine. Chris was once my intern at work. But never the less, they each have qualities that make me sweat.

Jess, who cannot be described. Britt, a brilliant artist who is absolutely fearless. Steve, though he will never admit it, is a phenomenal writer, great to the point that his Twitter updates make me want to give up. Chris is young and insanely ambitious, thus making an old-head-in-comparison like me nervous. Jess Corra is an agented author with a fabulous book coming out in the very near future.

Don’t be fooled by the smile, he’ll steal your job

The fact that all of these people have these qualities, makes them fantastic companions to write with. They keep me on my toes (Chris), they make me want to be better at what I do (Britt and Steve), they give me something to aspire to (Jess and Jess).

So really, I can’t recommend this strategy enough. Surround yourself with friendly, intimidating people. Let yourself be terrified. Be nervous. Let your hands sweat when they are ready to dish out advice. It’s the best.

Ah, Montreal. You were a fabulous city to spend the New Year in. Wonderful people, clean street, and food that inspired me to purchase home workout equipment while on my Amtrak ride back.

I feel like the above picture pretty much sums up my entire writing experience while in Canada. I spent most mornings and afternoons in coffee shops and cute restaurants, where I would nurse my hangovers (the people in my hostel were a blast) while sipping coffee or eating poutine (thanks for showing me the best places Liz & Kim). Also the fireworks were pretty fantastic, and I was in seriously good company

And because the weather was so horribly frigid, I didn’t have much of a choice but to sit and write every day. Wandering the city was tough in the cold, so holing up in a cute cafe was the best way to spend the day. Night time I’d hit the clubs (ugh karaoke), sure. But during the day, I kept warm with my netbook.

When I left for the trip, the new book was a little over 40,000 words. Now? As of this posting, I’m at 62k. I’ve been working on it since I came back to Philly, yes, but a lot of that happened while abroad. Note, Textual Healing was a little over 60k, and I really only feel like I’m halfway through this story I’m working on. Kind of scary, very exciting.

Anyhow, I’ve pasted my favorite photos from the trip below,or you could just flip through them on my Flickr page for 200+ more. Trying to figure out where my next stop will be, other than Lobsterfest in Maine come August. Any recs?

Took this photo as soon as I got off the train.

Montreal had some really cool public art.

Seriously. So neat.

New Years Eve in Montreal = CRAZY.

Thousands of people.

Trying to walk back was impossible.

Nighttime wandering the city.

Wandering at night.

Best brunch of my life, thanks Kim!

A blogger friend (sup Kim!) and her pal.

Cool windows in downtown Montreal.

Kim approves.

Such a cool building.

Crazy guys in my hostel made their own cups… out of beer cans.

Never Have I Ever does not translate well into other languages. Played anyway.

This photo sums up my trip quite nicely. Spent a lot of time in that particular Starbucks.

Some of the best advice Robin Black (go buy If I Loved You I Would Tell You This before continuing) ever gave me, was on the importance of “treating your inner writer.”

While I’m sure she said this in a far more elegant (and possibly award-winning) way, she made this fantastic point in one of our creative writing classes about how necessary it is to give yourself little rewards for doing… well, just about anything when it comes to your writing. It’s something I’ve carried with me ever since those graduate school days.

It’s a simple concept really, but an important one.

Writing is a pain. As much as I love it, sitting down and dedicating a solid few hours to working on my new book, drafting up another essay, or fiddling around with blogs on Geekadelphia… it takes a lot of effort. There are so many other things I would rather be doing. I live in an awesome city, full of amazing restaurants and cultural events. My friends are all social media addicts, and are easily accessible as distractions. There is always something more fun to engage in that isn’t the solitary act of slumping over my netbook and gazing at that intimidating, glowing screen.

As the weather gets cold and I just want to stay inside, treating myself has become a serious means of motivation, and Robin’s advice has been on my mind in a big way.

I find its easier to tear myself away from, say, a game of Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, when I’m promising myself a tall gingerbread spiced latte at Starbucks. The urge to order delivery and watch a movie is negated by treating myself to tortilla chips from El Fuego, a local burrito joint, and writing by the restaurant’s front window. I force myself out to the Green Line Cafe for a hot tea whenever new episodes of my favorite shows hit Hulu Plus, telling myself I can watch them after I finish at least an hour of writing there.

There’s this joke I like to bring up, from Family Guy, about writers having to write in public because OMG how else would people know they were writers. It’s hilarious and probably true for some people. For me, I’m out and about treating myself so I will write.

Shrug.

Like I said, the idea is simple. Whether you’re fussing over a book, an essay, a blog post, or a poem (or broem, sup Brian), remember to treat your inner writer. You’ll feel better about yourself, and get work done.

Treat. Yo. Self.

Getting attractive ladies to read your book, helps!

Well, its been a full year since Textual Healing came out, my senior capstone project turned novel. Over the course of that year I learned a lot about the self publishing process. It was incredibly frustrating and cost me a hell of a lot of money, but in the end, I think it was all worth it, despite the rising anger in my chest every time I think of the self publisher I used.

When it came out, Textual Healing received a lot of nice press. Tons of book bloggers wrote about it and said glowing things. I even saw some print press, which is a really hard thing to get when it comes to a self published book. It has an average 4 star review on Goodreads, with nearly 70 ratings. It even sold enough copies to recoup nearly half of what I spent getting the book published in the first place.

All in all, a success as far as I’m concerned.

However, as more and more of my friends and folks I’ve met through the Internets talk about self publishing, I find myself concerned. Because really, while I’m happy with the result of my silly book, I know a lot of people would be epically disappointed if they had my results.

So, I’ve written this little list of key things I’ve learned about the process, to hopefully help folks that decide to do something similar. Because it is hard, it is frustrating, and ya’ll need to be prepared.

1. Have Low Expectations: You’re psyched. Your first book is coming out. You’re daydreaming about watching your Amazon rankings shoot up into the stratosphere, making best of lists, signing movies deals, and…

Yeah… please stop doing that. Please.

Yes, there are lots of awesome success stories when it comes to self publishing, but those are rare considering the sheer number of books that get churned out from these publishers. Don’t count on your book getting a ton of press, popping up in bookstores across the country or making you a ton of money. Press won’t want it, your self publishing company can’t get it in bookstores and even if your book does sell a thousand copies, you’ll probably just barely recoup your expenses.

If you are doing this for the money, you’re already #doingitwrong.

Me, I went in with pretty low expectations regarding my book. I was lucky. My silly book did get a lot of press, but really, most of that only happened because of Geekadelphia, my existing relationships with bloggers and my own toilsome marketing tactics (a podcast that failed, Goodreads giveaways that I spent lots of money on, etc) for the title.

If you go in with low expectations, everything great that happens, whether it is a press hit or a kind review on Amazon, will only feel 100% more fantastic. There is nothing wrong with daydreaming, but stay realistic.

—

2. Book Bloggers Seldom Review Self Published Books: Yes yes. You’ve written the next Great American Novel or whatever. You’re like Paul Giamatti in Sideways. Great book, no one wants it. So you go ahead and make things happen yourself, thinking everyone will want to read it.

Eh, not so much.

I took this review policy screenshot from Well Read Wife, a book blogger I ADORE working with when it comes to promoting Quirk titles. She doesn’t accept self-published books, and really, I can’t blame her. I’ve seen my fair share of self published author pitch emails sent to Geekadelphia, poorly written press releases, etc. It hurts, knowing that these folks are putting their baby out there without proper support (that’s why you get a publicist), and book bloggers simply don’t have the time to read through all that (to borrow an editorial term) slush. They have tons of quality stuff heading their way on a weekly basis.

If you want a book blogger to review your book, make sure you check out their review policy first. If they do take self published books, there are likely a lot of savvy writers like you scoping out blogs this way. Make your pitch worthwhile. Show them that you’re different. A lot of people are going to be trying to do the same. If you can afford it, your best bet is to pool together a list of these bloggers, and deliver them to your publicist.

And sorry, large media won’t want your book either, unless there is some sort of outstanding story connected to it. Or you know, a horrible, HORRIBLE scandal.

—

Note: Book publicists are not tools who wear Bluetooths

3. Hire a Publicist: So I mentioned publicists in the first and second piece here, and there’s a reason. Unless you’ve quit your day job to support your self published book (are you out of your mind, why the hell would you do that?), you are going to need help getting your book out there. Sending out pleading emails asking bloggers to review your book is great, but you’re representing yourself. That… well, that looks kind of sad. It’s bad enough you’re self published. And like I said, most bloggers don’t WANT self published books. And bigger media? Forget it. Not going to happen.

Your best bet is to hire a publicist to represent you and make you look good. Some self publishing companies do offer up publicity in the packages for a little extra, but with over 26,000 books coming out from some of these publishers a year (A YEAR!) how much time do you think they will really have to dedicate to your little book? Is it better to spend a couple grand extra on a publicist that won’t have time for you, or hire a personal one that you can meet one-on-one for the same price?

Not a hard question to answer now, is it?

Me, I was fortunate. I had a friend who worked at a publicity firm UPSTAIRS from my day job. Amazing, right? She did her best, and helped get the book some local print coverage, which I’m quite thankful for. My budget was super limited (self publishing a book is expensive!), and she did what she could with what I had. Her firm even bent over backwards when I was late with a payment. Good people.

—

4. Hire a Damn Editor: Alright, this is a lesson hard learned. I brought a friend on to look over my book, who did it for free, and unfortunately my book was still slammed with mistakes. In most reviews of the book, people noted that as much as they liked the story, it was in dire need of an editor. And really, they were right.

I mean, I’m from New Jersey, and I spelled Jägermeister wrong. Down the shore, my people live for that stuff.

Yes, you’re already spending a ton of money to get your book published, designed, etc. Spend a little extra. It’ll save you the embarrassment of flipping through your book after a review is posted, and epically facepalming. The more you read your own work, the less you notice the mistakes. You’ll start skimming. It’ll happen. Get some help.

—

This is your self publisher, when you call.

5. The Publisher Does Not Care About You: This concept is utterly ridiculous to me, considering I work at a place where we care a great deal about our authors. Unfortunately in self publishing, these people aren’t interested in you as a person, a creative individual. You’re just a big ol’ burlap sack with a dollar sign painted on it.

Yes, I realize that is a sweeping generalization. But with AuthorHouse, such was the case.

Here’s the thing. Your publisher isn’t going to go mad promoting your book, because really, they’ve got nothing to lose if it doesn’t do well. Remember that large sum of money you plopped down to make your book happen? Whether it was $500 or $5000, the publisher has already made their money.

And promotion? Forget about it. While just about every real publisher is thrilled to bring your book to expos and conventions (ie: Comic Con, Book Expo America, etc), a self publisher will charge a gross sum of money to toss your book on a shelf. In fact, a recent email from AuthorHouse invited me to have my book on display at the Miami Book Fair… for $500.Unfortunately, this kind of promotion fools less than savvy new authors. I’ve seen those self published books, lining the selves of vanity presses at book expos. And now that I know how much it cost them, it breaks my heart.

With Textual Healing, phone calls to the publisher regarding issues that to do with the book design, layout, marketing, publicity, etc… proved incredibly difficult. I would be on hold for close to an hour each time, and made a habit of calling them on my way to and from work. However, any calls or emails that had to do with purchasing bulk boxes of books… immediate answers, never on hold. Surprise surprise.

So sorry kids, your self publisher isn’t going to go mad helping you with your book… because they’ve got nothing to lose if it doesn’t do well. They just want your money. Don’t do it.

—

Conclusion: Am I saying you shouldn’t self publish a book? Eh. It isn’t for everyone. If you don’t have the funds to get a publicist on board, hire an editor and design a really nice cover, do reconsider. If you don’t already have some sort of platform to promote yourself, you’ll need to build one. It isn’t a point and click process, no matter what your check out cart w/ the publisher may say. Get ready to work to make things happen.

Further Reading: Here’s some good reading on self publishing.

• The Myth of Self Publishing – Portfolio Imprint (Penguin)
• 26 Ways to Win at Self Publishing (Super uplifting post from the Book Designer)
• Why Should Anyone Care? (Great post from Cory Doctorow)
• The Rise in Self Publishing (NY Times)

Well, I turned 29 this week. I celebrated appropriately. I spent a weekend in Atlantic City with my best friend, had a bros’ night at Gunners Run in Northern Liberties on my actual birthday (Tim and I are still haunted by the fllet mignon sandwich we had there), and I plan to spend this weekend partying Halloween style, thanks to the traditional Geekadelphia & Indy Hall bash at Tattooed Mom (over 120+ people are coming!) and my pal Jay with his annual costumed celebration at his apartment.

At work (where we had a fancy hat party), two of my coworkers asked me how I was planning to enjoy the last year of my 20′s. I hadn’t quite thought of it that way. I’d mostly been stressing about hitting 30, but not how I’d actually spend my final year.

So, here’s a little list I’ve made for myself. Hopefully I stick to it.

1. Make One More Epic Costume: I’m concerned that my obsession with awesome costumes (shared with Geekadelphia co-founder / eternal BFF Tim Quirino) may seem a little more ridiculous once I’m in my 30′s. When people find out that my biggest adult purchase was a full suit of Master Chief armor, I get laughs and nods of understanding, mostly due to the backstory of my heinous ex.

But what about when I’m 30? Admitting that my next biggest adult purchase is going to be a replica Rocketeer outfit, might not be met with the same sort of good humored approval.

Oh, and yeah. The next costume is going to be the Rocketeer. As a kid, I was obsessed with that movie. It’ll be expensive, but I’ll find a way to make it work.

This is a point of mockery in my circle of friends (Allie & Jay, I saw that), so I think I’ll try and work on that.

I’m going to try to make it a point to actually go to one of these shows with him, and tear it up in the pit, whether its a rock concert or a ska show. Most people would be worried, but luckily, Schmidt has arms the size of legs. I’ll be fine.

Note: Google searching for the term “skank” has unpleasant results.

3. Finish the New Book: Unfortunately I haven’t really touched my in-progress manuscript since my vacation. I had to spend a week playing catch up at work, and then spent almost a week at New York Comic Con, followed by another week of playing catch up… sigh. It’s been wonderfully busy. Thankfully, I adore my job and the books I’m working on, so really, it’s not a big deal.

Right now the manuscript is at 30,000 words, and I’m really thrilled with it. My peers seem to dig it as well, which is always nice. But why before 30? Not sure, really. It’d just be nice to say I finished my second book before I turned 30, is all. Plus, it’s nice to have goals set down. Puts the pressure on. You know?

4. Visit Three More Countries: Just so I can round it out to an even five. Already went to Ireland, and come New Years I’ll be staying in Montreal for a week. Though I’ve been to Canada before back in my touring days, I never stayed there for an extended period of time. I think I want to go someplace… old. Like Rome. And not just because I’m currently reading Eat Pray Love.

Now taking suggestions. And not for other books. I freaking like Eat Pray Love. Shut up.

Well, my trip to Puerto Rico was definitely an epic success, both creatively and personally. I relaxed, managed to not check my email every five seconds, got a ton of writing done, and had a lot of firsts.

Saw my first live hummingbird (which as a lot of you know, is a big deal for me), swam with manatees (what!), explored and hiked through a rain forest, saw bio luminescence up close and personal while kayaking… good times. I’ve uploaded all my favorite photos (and videos) to Flickr, so have a look. I also put my favorites below, showing off the highlights.

In terms of writing, well, when I left Philadelphia my new novel was just barely over 10k. Now I’m at over 30k, 100+ pages.

Crazy, right? It’s amazing what pulling yourself out of your element can do. Hoping to have a finished manuscript by the end of the year. Then, the agent search begins. Hooray.

First thing I took a photo of when I landed.

Language advice in the hostel.

Hallway in the hostel.

Out for a walk.

Old buildings in San Juan.

Gorgeous buildings in Old San Juan.

Rescued this hermit crab from the street. <3

Nice place to wait for a bus.

I want to marry the girl who wrote this. <3

Walking on the fort in San Juan.

It’s true. <3

Had to go into Burger King. Couldn’t resist.

Oh hai!

Waterfall in the rainforest

A tower in the rainforest

The rainforest!

Relaxing on Loquillo Beach.

The beach!

My bags are packed. The new netbook (not a crappy… whatever that monster laptop is pictured above) is loaded with my favorite music. It’s time to go.

As much as I like leaving work and heading straight to Rittenhouse Square to write, there are still an endless amount of distractions. Grabbing lemonade at Cosi. Playing with strangers’ puppies. People watching. Checking Facebook, Twitter, etc. on my iPhone. As for writing at home, I’ve got my Xbox, my Apple TV, the Internet, my freaking bunny… the distraction list is enormous, even if I use Freedom to turn off my Internet.

So starting tomorrow, I’m on a little writing vacation. No Internet and limited phone access for most of it. I’m off to Puerto Rico for a little under a week to sit in the sun and then to Boston to hang around various coffee shops. The plan? To finish banging out a rough manuscript I’ve been fiddling with all year. It’s a YA fantasy story that I’m really excited about. 50 pages in and the feedback I’ve received from friends (thank you Jess, Kishwer) has been fantastic. Time to make it happen.

It’s funny. I never gave YA much thought. It wasn’t until I found myself working on Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs, that I fell in love with the genre. I read the book late last year, long before we put it into stores. Afterwards, in a matter of months, I tore through all the books in the Hunger Games, the Percy Jackson series, the Mortal Instruments series, and a number of other single titles (all soon to be trilogies) over the year, like Divergent and Ship Breaker. I also discovered Matched and Across the Universe while researching YA bloggers, and picked them up after reading the endless recommendations.

So thanks Ransom. This is all your fault.

Music for the trip includes the discography of Acceptance, Butch Walker, Gin Blossoms, Jimmy Eat World, Sherwood, Third Eye Blind, Vertical Horizon, and The Wallflowers… my favorite music to write to. Note: All those links lead to their respective Last.FM profiles. You’re welcome.

Don’t get me wrong, I fully intend on snorkeling, exploring, taking pictures… all that good stuff you’re supposed to do while on an island (unless that island is Ireland, of course). But I won’t let myself do any of those things until I meet my quota of 2 – 3k words a day.

All that being said… BRB! K? THNXBAI.

So I only blog on this personal site two or three times a month, sometimes way more if a lot is going on (see April). So I’m going to start these little monthly recaps of what I’ve been up to, since I feel like I’ve been doing so much… only I don’t have the time to write long drawn out posts about every little thing. So yeah. Here goes. May 2011.

Geekadelphia Highlights:

I was named one of “The 20″ by NBC Philadelphia. It’s a list of influential voices in the social media world here in Philly. A really flattering, sweet gesture… though I’m sure I will be briskly removed once they realize all Geekadelphia does is tweet blog posts, snarky things to Technically Philly, and make silly jokes through out the day. Still, really awesome.

I attended Philadelphia Tech Week and made a fool out of myself. The video is available for the entire world to watch. Apologies, Chris Wink. You know I love you.

I was asked to appear as a celebrity judge for a competitive comedy show called ComedySportz. Despite the fact that the event fell on the same day as the Rittenhouse Row Festival, I agreed, and brought several friends… so they could see what a big deal I was, of course. The event was fabulous. I was genuinely shocked at what a great time I had, and it was nice meeting a lot of Geekadelphia fans. Apparently 75% of the ticket holders got to the event because of Geekadelphia, which thrilled me. Can’t wait to go again.

Writing Highlights:

Textual Healing continues to get reviewed here and there. My friend Allie Harcharek just finished re-editing the thing, and a second printing is in the works.

My essay that’ll be appearing in The Apiary literary journal will pop up in the Winter of 2011. Super psyched.

Quirk & Work Highlights:

I announced that I’d be doing freelance marketing and publicity for my pals Parker and Jake, who have a small video game dev company called Flyclops. It’s always been a little dream of mine to work in gaming, and now, at last, I am. At least a little. And that counts.

The new Quirkbooks.com launched, and looks absolutely fabulous. Designed by the folks at 160/90, it’s a massive improvement on the old website. Especially since… you know, the old website didn’t work and was slammed with infections.

Shortly after the launch, I wrote a silly Top 10 Animated Gifs of Michael Bolton blog post on the site, which was immediately picked up and tweeted / Facebooked by Michael Bolton. No, not the guy from Office Space. The actual singer. Yes, I took a screenshot of the Tweet. Yes I printed it out. Yes I have it hanging in my office. What of it?

I attended BEA, my first big book expo, and oh my God, it was awesome. Met lots of bloggers, did some networking, all that good stuff.

Life in General:

I got all the remaining pieces of my Master Chief armor. A process that began last Summer, mostly out of heartache, is finally complete. I own a suit so heavy I can hardly walk in it and can’t put it on without help… and I am unbelievably happy. Spartan-215.com will definitely become more active (though I have been posting pictures almost daily), in the coming weeks. I can’t WAIT for Wizard World with Tim.

Speaking of Tim, he asked me to be in his wedding party. There were tears.

Campus Splash, who published my ramblings on using Oregon Trail in the classroom, posted another one of my “young hip professor” essays. It was retweeted by USA Today, awesome!

The essay is all about why I don’t mind students texting in class and, at the same time, the girlfriend and I’s second date. Give it a read, I hope you enjoy it.

Love & Text on Campus Splash
campussplash.com/love-text-students-text-class